"All relationships are doomed. If you emotionally undress in front of someone, they will pour acid on your shivering skin and leave you to die."
Howard, Fresh Meat (via dissapolnted)

(Source: feellng, via heyitsalexis)

unicorn-jiggles18:

Yaassss!

k-elizabeth-t:

This boy at Target asked if I would hold his hand because his ex girlfriend just walked in with a new guy, so naturally I felt bad and held his hand while strolling around Target for a bit. Then it donned on me, with no other couple in sight, that was the best damn pick up line ever pulled.

(via emaleebabe)

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